I find condoms to be a problem. They are itchy around my penis and skin. Is there other methods of safe sex? I have been dating my girlfriend for about 3 months and she is the first person I ever had sex with.

First of all I commend you for using condoms despite this discomfort! Second, while there are other methods of safer sex, none of them are as simple, effective, and cost efficient as condoms. Condoms (and other barrier methods such as dental dams) protect partners from sexually transmitted infections as well as pregnancy! And they’re easy to find and legal for people of all ages to buy.

One trick you can use to make condoms more comfortable is to apply lube to your penis before putting on the condom. This will not only make the condom feel more comfortable, the lube will help heat and friction transfer through the latex so that sex will feel more pleasurable. Woohoo! Just make sure not to add too much lube and risk the condom slipping off during sex. Enough lube to thinly coat your skin should be plenty.

…lube will help heat and friction transfer through the latex so that sex will feel more pleasurable

– Caitlin V

If that doesn’t do the trick, my next advice is for you to try larger condoms! They tend to be more comfortable than regular size and they usually fit on an average-size penis without increased risk of slipping off. Of course, you should make sure that this is true for you before using them with a partner. To check if a condom fits correctly put it on (using the instructions provided in the packaging) and feel around the base of your penis. It should feel snug, with no wiggle room and no space between your skin and the condom. Add some lube (spit works just fine), wrap your hand around your penis and stroke it a few times to make sure it doesn’t slip. If it stays on securely try it during penetrative sex, but make sure to check on it more frequently than you would with a regular condom (which should still be pretty frequently). This is good advice for anyone who feels that regular condoms are too constricting. Large condoms are typically labeled as such and usually come in gold wrapper. Now you can tell everyone you have the Midas touch.

[Female condoms] are great for so many reasons: they’re not made out of latex, you don’t have to throw it out if you lose an erection, you can insert it before you’re ready for penetration so there’s no lull in the action

Caitlin V

If you’ve tried larger condoms and are still experiencing discomfort my advice is for you to try a female (AKA internal) condom. These condoms are great for so many reasons: they’re not made out of latex, you don’t have to throw it out if you lose an erection, you can insert it before you’re ready for penetration so there’s no lull in the action. The only downsides are that they are more expensive than latex condoms and sometimes harder to find, although any good drug store should stock them.

Before we wrap it up (get it?) I want to clarify that you’re not experiencing any itchy or irritation when you’re not wearing a condom, because those could be signs of a sexually transmitted infection. If that’s the case, please get yourself tested right away. If you have health insurance, tell your doctor that you’ve partaken in some risky sexual activity and your STI tests should be covered. If not, there’s tons of free and low-cost testing available, and although locating those testing services in your area might take a bit of work, in the end knowing your status will be worth it.