My friends, the sexiest holiday is upon us.
Flames flicker, skirts get shorter, the good girl next door transforms into a daring sorceress …
It’s the night we unearth the scary, haunted parts of ourselves we thought were buried…
We can let our skeletons out of the closet for some ghoulish delights. 👻
So this, my dear conjurers, is the time to bewitch your sex life.
Unleash your inner devil.
In fact, you can become whatever you want… even just for one night.
Turn into a sexy cattle rancher, a crypt keeper, or Mick Jagger.
Be the boss. Be the servant. Be the virgin sacrifice.
Consider this a spell book of essential do’s and don’ts to make role play feel natural, fun, and steamy.
My step-by-step guide for having amazing role play sex
It’s time to turn up the volume and bring this extra fun sizzle to sex. It’s also a great time to experiment with other stuff, domination and submission, bondage, pain and pleasure. These are all really, really on theme for a Halloween.
Step 1: Bring it Up to your Partner
Communicate! Talk to your partner beforehand, especially if the role-play scenario that you want to act out involves some prep work, or surprise, or violence.
Don’t just throw on a balaclava and break into the room and kidnap your partner. That’s not cool.
You also don’t want to show up in your doctor costume ready to give them a physical, if you haven’t given them at least a heads up.
What if you’re too shy to bring it up?
There are different ways you can bring up your fantasy.
I recommend saying something along the lines of, “I had a dream the other night that you were a sexy teacher from my college and I was your naughty students staying after class. I love that idea.”
Sometimes it’s just easiest to ask, “You know what would be really hot? If we did some role play.”
Step 2: Come up with your creative and sexy role play idea
- Boss and assistant
- doctor and nurse
- Sex worker and client
- Porn star
- Gym teacher and coach or student
- College professor and student
- Naughty teacher and student
- Doctor and nurse
- Hitchhiker and truck driver
- Yoga teacher and yoga student
- Reenacting losing your virginity as teenagers
All of these don’t require a ton of setup. In fact, outside of communicating that you’re open to it, the only other thing that you really need to do to get ready is express any boundaries that you have.
Which leads us to our next point…
Step 3: Establish Boundaries
As with any other new sex stuff, role-play requires you to discuss your boundaries first. To say to your partner, “You know what, that would be really hot, but this action would be going too far.”
Boundaries sound like, “I don’t think I want you to call me any derogatory or mean names.” Or, “That scenario that you’ve just described that may be triggering for me because I did get sexually assaulted by my boss one time. And I think for me to make that work, it would have to be like this.”
Communication from the very beginning assures everyone is going to have the best possible time.
You Don’t Have to Overly Complicate Role Play.
None of the scenarios that I’ve described require even so much as a costume.
In fact, you can usually just start using language in order to get into your roles. Use your imagination!
You already have everything you need in your naughty little mind in order to make role-play successful.
But once you do get into it, and you are familiar and comfortable with using those words, I encourage you to step it up by adding costumes, wigs, even a different setting.
One of My All-Time Favorite Role Play Ideas (& How to Make it Work)
One very popular role play that I personally love and totally get behind, is pretending to meet your spouse as two total strangers at a hotel bar.
Go up, get a room.
I highly recommend that you make up a persona, throw on a wig, even add some temporary tats! Really get into character and don’t just show up and make it up on the spot. Develop your character beforehand. You will be so glad that you did. Think about this character’s backstory, the things that they say, the way that they speak, how they carry themselves, think about the way that they have sex.
And stay in character! Even if the awkwardness makes you giggle, just go right back to it. You’ll have way more fun that way.
You Don’t Need a Special Occasion to Get Kinky
I love Halloween for all its possibilities, but you can get freaky any night of the year. If you’re looking for ideas on how to wow your female partner… how to master foreplay, become king of cunnilingus, and give her intense orgasms, check out the She Comes Too Masterclass.