Bro, I get it. You exist, so, therefore, you should get hot sex with hot women whenever you want.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that. To be a high-value man — that is, the kind of guy women will be attracted to and want to invest their time and energy in — you need to invest in yourself and become the best version of yourself.
In this article, I’ll explain our misconceptions about what a High-Value Man is and then give you 4 Ms that will help make YOU a High-Value Man.
I promise they will help you raise your desirability to new levels and help you be a fantastic lover, boyfriend, husband… number #1 draft pick at the orgy, whatever it is your goal is.
Table of Contents
A High-Value Man is Not an Alpha Male
Whenever I broach this topic, I get lots of comments like, “You’re describing a sigma male!” or “No, you’re wrong, even though I offer nothing positive or redeeming and kinda smell weird the hottest women in the world should be sprinting at me from 100 yards away and leaping onto my dick!”
And to that, I say, this is NOT about being an alpha male or the macho-est of macho men. It’s not about Ferraris and Rolexes and Swiss chalets. And it’s not about going on spiritual retreats in ponchos and talking about emotions in a whispery ASMR voice.
Being a High-Value Man is all about showcasing and cultivating the traits within you that will help you be more desirable, in general, to women you are interested in.
So, very important: It’s not a guarantee! You’re not owed anything just because you correctly washed your ass once! But, by managing your 4 Ms, you will increase the probability of reaching your sex and relationship goals.
The 4 M’s of a High-Value Man
Here are the most essential steps to becoming a man women will be interested in.
The first M: Muscles!
Move your body! Get out of that gaming chair for a few hours every day. The good news is women aren’t as looks-obsessed when choosing a mate as men are. So you don’t have to be an ultra-jacked bodybuilder or one of those insane CrossFit guys with those protruding six-packs.
Not even close! However, women still tend to be more attracted to men who put some thought and care into their physical health. So whatever exercise you choose, it doesn’t have to be intense, and it just has to be something. Hit the gym a few times a week, go for a run every couple of days, shoot some hoops, do some yoga! Whatever works for you.
You can even work out with no weights, at home, with something called the prison workout. That’s where you do 120 push-ups in a day. Yeah, you heard me right: a day! You can do 20 here, another 15 a little bit later, whatever works for you. And if that isn’t challenging enough, go for 150 a day. Then 200! See how high you can build up to.
You can also do bodyweight squats the same. That’s simply where you squat down with no weight, bending your knees at least 90 degrees, and then stand back up. Try for 150 a day, then increase. Or, add a backpack and put some weight in it.
Whatever you do, even just implementing something simple and easy, will start to show you results.
AND, you will get even MORE results if you limit the crappy foods you put in your body. Try reducing fried or processed foods, eat more greens, drink more water and less beer. You know all this, you’ve heard all this before, and that’s because… it works! More movement and a better diet equal a healthier body.
One final bit of advice: make reasonable goals. If you start doing push-ups and get mad you don’t look like Chris Hemsworth after a week, your expectations may be a little high. Unreasonable or unattainable physical goals tend to make us more inclined to give up and do nothing, so start with a plan you know you can achieve.
The second M: Money!
You don’t need to be Jeff Bezos to attract a woman. I mean, don’t get me wrong, no one’s going to be mad if you have a pool with a waterslide. However, far more than the amount of money you have, women prefer men who have a healthy relationship with money.
That means you are making money, saving money, investing money and spending money all in a balanced, responsible way.
In today’s world, most women are self-sufficient and make their own money. So, to a woman who doesn’t need a man’s money to survive, the gold-chained millionaire who is always losing hundreds of thousands of dollars at the casino and is constantly on the phone screaming at his financial advisor is gonna be less attractive than the guy with a steady, modest-paying job, a 401K and an ability to budget, but also treat their girlfriend to a nice dinner from time to time.
Look at your money situation and assess if you have problems making, saving, investing or responsibly spending money. If you do, you might want to focus on getting that aspect of your wealth in line and checking in with a financial advisor.
The third M: Masculinity
Just because you’re alpha doesn’t mean you’re going to omega your woman cum. Masculinity is about far more than big muscles, fast cars, and worshipping Dan Blizerian. It’s about being secure and confident and not overcompensating and being a giant asshole to everyone just because you’re 5’4″ or have skinny calves or your parents named you Tober.
In fact, having a healthy relationship with your masculinity means having a healthy relationship with your feminine side. Are you the guy who’s going to happily put on that tutu and have a tea party with your kid, or are you the guy who’s going to scream at your son and call him a slur for not being good enough at sports? Guess which one is more attractive to women?
And guess what, after you’re done with your tutu and tea party, you can still go get that sleeve tattoo and chop wood and crush beer cans on your forehead. Again, it’s about having a healthy, secure relationship with both the masculine and the feminine.
The fourth M: Mojo
Mojo is essential! It’s like swag, but it’s not necessarily about cockiness or Big Dick Energy. It’s more like… Fun Dick Energy.
Mojo is the confidence to try new things, be your charming authentic self and explore the things your partner is interested in, even if it freaks you out a little or takes you out of your comfort zone. Think of it as a recipe. It’s a little bit of a playful attitude mixed with sexiness mixed with a healthy, rounded lifestyle and a little bit of extra effort put into your grooming. It’s a fresh beard trim; it’s that T-shirt you feel extra confident in because it shows off your guns, it’s a body wash that smells great, it’s that spontaneous getaway vacation or a secure, drunk rendition of a Third Eye Blind song at karaoke.
It’s being led by curiosity instead of fear, confidence instead of doubt. We’re all sexy as fuck if we believe it, and Mojo is believing it.
It’s Time to Harness your 4 M’s
Okay, so now that you’ve harnessed the power of your muscles, money, masculinity and mojo, congratulations, you’re now a graduate of the Chris Evans school of hot, high-value men. Remember, all of the M’s we talked about are about balance and confidence, not necessarily being the most extreme or intense version of each category.
If you remember that, and if you always act with integrity and kindness and make sure you keep your energy focused on your partner, you’ll become desirable on all sorts of new levels. Which, as we know, means better sex, more sex, better relationships, deeper relationships and healthier connections.