You get ONE chance to make her want to sleep with you. And that chance lasts about as long as a first impression: a couple seconds.
If you get this wrong, she won’t ever want to sleep with you because once a woman decides you’re in the “no-zone”, it’s tough for her to see you in a different light.
The fastest way to end up in a woman’s “no-zone”? Coming off as creepy.
And unfortunately, a lot of men come off as creepy without realizing it. That’s why in this article, you’ll learn how to avoid creepiness so you can successfully flirt with women, get laid, and have an amazing sex and dating life.
Table of Contents
But First, a Truth: Woman Want to be Seduced.
Most women want to be swept off their feet and have amazing sex. In fact, she might be sitting there thinking about having sex with you. If you mess it up by creeping her out, you’ll blow your chances.
So if she had got a good first initial read on you, and then you say or do something to creep her out, that door slams shut pretty fast.
And that’s too bad, because you’re not a creep.
How do I know that?
Because most men are not creeps. But when you follow a formula to pick up women, particularly one coined by some male pickup artist, it comes off as inauthentic. Women can sense when you’re just trying to get something out of them.
So let’s start with what creepiness is.
The root of all creepiness
All creepiness stems from neediness.
When you only think about how you can benefit from her — what you can get from her — she will pick up on that and feel creeped out.
No woman wants to feel like they’re interacting with a predator. And when you disregard what makes her feel comfortable to prioritize what you want in the moment, she won’t be able to trust you.
And according to Julia Shaw from Ted, “Creepiness may be our reaction to not knowing whether we should be scared of someone.”
Another definition of creepiness is being disconnected from reality. This is when you are disconnected from what you can expect from a woman in a given situation. This is when men start to violate boundaries to get what they want.
This is why it’s essential to read her verbal and nonverbal cues.
How to read a woman’s verbal cues
Much of the time, creepiness stems from not keying into her feelings and needs. A woman’s verbal cues are what she says.
- She says whether she’s into you or not.
- She says whether she wants to continue hanging out with you or not.
- She says whether she has to leave — or whether she wants to continue things.
How to read a woman’s non-verbal cues
Non-verbal cues are what a woman doesn’t say with her mouth — but says with her body language. She might be too polite to tell you to leave her alone… so it’s essential to key into what she’s telling you with her body.
- Is she turning toward you, or is she turning away from you?
- Is she looking at you, or are her eyes roaming around the room?
- Is she contributing to the conversation, or is she trying to exit the conversation?
If her non-verbal cues are telling you she’s not interested, it’s time to walk away. You’re not going to change her mind.
With that said, let’s dive into the three techniques you can use to avoid all creepiness, so you can pick up women — whether online, at the bar, or on a dating app.
3 Techniques to Not being Creepy when Hitting on a Woman
Men are far more likely to be considered creepy than women. Here’s how to get around that.
Be clear about your intentions
Be honest up front. If you say something like, “I’d love to sleep with you eventually,” you’re not going to get friend-zoned, and she’s going to understand immediately, right off the bat, what your intentions are with her.
If she feels unsafe around you, she’s never going to let her guard down around you, whether it’s you making her feel unsafe, the environment making her feel unsafe, or something else.
If you convey to her that her safety is your priority, and if you’re clear about your intention in that, she’s going to feel really good around you pretty quickly.
Be cool with walking away
If you value yourself, you will not grovel, beg, or steal to get laid, and you will be a more attractive man.
You do not need validation from these women to know your self-worth. This demonstrates you are not pushy or trying to force an outcome.
This attitude is the antithesis to creepy because you’re not obsessed with a certain outcome happening. You’re cool with anything, and you can go with the flow.
Ask her questions and be genuinely curious about her
This is the SECRET to keeping a non-creepy conversation flowing.
Don’t be like those obnoxious dudes that only talk about themselves. Trust me, she will not find you attractive. Instead, she will find you obnoxious and that you are selling yourself to her like a used-car salesman trying to get rid of a crappy car.
Asking questions about her is a great way to show your dominance as a man. You are giving direction and putting attention on the submissive. The submissive then receives the direction and puts attention on themselves.
So if you focus only on yourself, you are not only acting like an asshole, but also playing the role of the submissive in the conversation. This is a surefire way for her to view you as creepy.
Asking her questions and being curious about her also shows that you are interested in her, and when you’re interested in her, she’s going to want to spend more time with you.
How to improve your success with women
The ultimate goal is to make women feel GOOD around you.
If a woman likes spending time with you at the bar, she’ll probably like spending time with you in her bedroom.
If you bring a playful, fun, lighthearted energy to your interactions, you’ll have an even better time, because you’ll become quick friends.
If you follow these guidelines, you’ll have more success picking up women, and women will feel safer and just plain better around you.